Soundproof bathrooms, toilets, and urinals

[palmertech]

Here's mine (my girlfriend says I look cute when I'm complaining about this, by the way )

Toilet bowls are made of two things: round, and porcelain. Now, let's start with porcelain. This is the most echoey stuff you can ever imagine. And when you're s(h)itting (sorry, word filter, but the 'h' really is optional ) on the toilet, you don't want noises to echo. At all. Not only that, but they make toilet bowls round! Why in the world would they make toilet bowls round, which only concentrates the noises made?

Oh, and as if that weren't enough, some interior designers were stupid enough to decide that, hey, why not put that echoey porcelain all over the damn bathroom? Just to make sure it echoes enough that anyone in an adjoining room can hear you, of course! Well, you know what, you damn "designers?" I hope one day, you meet the man (or woman) of your dreams. And soon after, just when you are ready to go on your first hot date, I hope you have to take the biggest crap of your life. And when you do, I hope this prospective significant other hears it as a result of your porcelain stupidity and runs away, scared just as sh*tless as you are.

There were several good ideas brought up in response, and this deserves a thread.

With the combined mind of the forums, can we come up with a practical/impractical solution to this problem which has long plagued our society?

[Aguiluz]

Take a radio and overpower the noise.

[eagle5953]

There isn't much that can be done.

By nature, bathrooms must be easy to clean well. Hard, non-porus surfaces are the best fit. You could carpet the floor and walls, and that would reduce echo, but it would be utterly disgusting in no time.

You can't do much with the shape of the toilet, either. The surfaces with the least echo are the kind in sound chambers - spikey. You want to be the one to try to clean a spikey toilet? Nope.

Incidentally, there's an old design that didn't concentrate noise much: an outhouse.

[nevermind1534]

There isn't much that can be done.

By nature, bathrooms must be easy to clean well. Hard, non-porus surfaces are the best fit. You could carpet the floor and walls, and that would reduce echo, but it would be utterly disgusting in no time.

You can't do much with the shape of the toilet, either. The surfaces with the least echo are the kind in sound chambers - spikey. You want to be the one to try to clean a spikey toilet? Nope.

Incidentally, there's an old design that didn't concentrate noise much: an outhouse.

One of my bathrooms used to be carpeted.

[Kurt_]

...

[nevermind1534]

...

I tore up the carpet and chipped away all of the stuff that they put over the tiles to put the carpet down.

[Kurt_]

1) What if someone misses?
2) Steam from showers = mold and mildew on and underneath carpet
3) WTF carpet?

[nevermind1534]

1) What if someone misses?
2) Steam from showers = mold and mildew on and underneath carpet
3) WTF carpet?

there was some rubeber cement type stuff under the carpet; it was carpet squares that the previous owners put over the ceramic tile. It is a half bath, so no bath or shower.

[vskid]

Take a radio and overpower the noise.

Or, cancel the sound with some opposite sound waves.

Carpet in almost any area where water can get on it is nasty.

[ShockSlayer]

Hang up many towels, and then put weather stripping on the door.

SS

[nevermind1534]

Hang up many towels, and then put weather stripping on the door.

SS

Nah, just stuff the towels under the door. Or you could do both.

[Metallica Man X]

You could always warn them of the impending noise assault, and if they're OK with that, you might just have a keeper there

In order for sound to be made, air needs to move...so.......most bowls are pretty solid, so sound won't go far from the sides and whatever--meaning the sound must echo out of somewere.

I would guess the main spot were sound emerges from would be the seat itself, as most seats are elevated above the bowl just a bit...you could coat that outer area with a soft, rubbery material that could absorb the air pressure change that creates the audible noise. It won't remove the sound, but it'd certainly dampen it down a bit.

[ShockSlayer]

Put a towel over your lap.

SS

[Mario]

"Hello, and welcome to Mythbusters. Today we're testing the best way to keep the sounds of your bowel movements inside the bathroom. Unlike most episodes, please, do try this at home."

[Black Six]

Put noise-dampening insulation in the walls, floor, and ceiling. Get a thick, sound proof door.

Problem solved.