It's possible to chat: With GOD!

[SIZIK]

God apparently doesn't know his languages very well. I said something in Spanish, and he replied in German! (and he doesn't seem to care he's chatting with Satan)


Me:
Hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
Satan
God:
OK I will call you Satan.
Me:
How ya doin?
God:
I am fine, thank you.
Me:
What's my name?
God:
Your name is Satan, seeker.
Me:
Yahweh
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
?
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
yes
God:
Next question?
Me:
Jehovah
God:
Are you a student?
Me:
no
God:
What is your profession?
Me:
i smoke heroin
God:
What brand?
Me:
Disney
God:
I never heard of it. Is it popular?
Me:
On pluto it is
God:
What is it like on pluto it is.
Me:
Very cold
God:
Not really that much. Ambiguous: cold weather or cold sickness?
Me:
weather
God:
Rainy.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
totally!
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, Satan.
Me:
You ever been to Hell?
God:
I don't think I have been there. Where is it.
Me:
In Norway
God:
Tell me a little about your life in Norway.
Me:
I don't live in Norway
God:
Where do you live?
Me:
Hell
God:
Heaven.
Me:
Lucifer
God:
How did you hear about God?
Me:
I tormented someone he knew named Job
God:
That's good information: Satan said tormented someone he knew named Job.
Me:
No it isn't
God:
Yes it is.
Me:
Nuh-uh
God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
if (iAmHungry == true) { eat(food); } else { watch(TV) }
God:
That is a hypothetical question. When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
You mean it hasn't?
God:
Yes Satan I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Me:
Sir, yes sir!
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
Qué?
God:
Who are you talking about?
Me:
Yo mama
God:
Are you asking about my mother?
Me:
She's so fat, ... she's just really fat.
God:
fat is she? fat is she?
Me:
Fat she is.
God:
Is that from ?
Me:
No, it's to.
God:
Are you serious? Should I know it is?
Me:
You better know it is
God:
Who is going to make me..
Me:
I triple dog dare you!
God:
You are not the boss of me, Satan.
Me:
Because I just fired you.
God:
That makes sense to me. You are not the boss of me, Satan.
Me:
Now get out of my office!
God:
Why now? Just surf somewhere else.
Me:
I don't like the beach
God:
What do you like?
Me:
eggs
God:

Me:
Speechless, are you?
God:
Only when it matters.
Me:
You meen she bit ya?
God:
Interesting gossip: Satan said I meen she bit ya.
Me:
No es interesante.
God:
Are you serious? Worauf bezieht sich "es"?
Me:
"Es" bezieht sich den auf Klatsch.
God:
Das kommt darauf an, was Du mit "es" meinst.
Me:
Können wir Deutsches, zu sprechen stoppen?
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
Thank you for your time.
God:
You are quite welcome! I really couldn't say for sure. Only for me?
Me:
It's a limited time offer!
God:
Können wir Deutsches zu sprechen stoppen is a limited time offer. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
But you don't
God:
I guess not.
Me:
Goodbye God.
God:
Until next time.
Me:
Adios.
God:
Bye.